This is a simplified explanation of how I got to where I am today in regards to being transgender. As with most things in life, there’s more to it, but this hits the important points. It’s important to stress that this is not how everyone experiences it, and quite a few people get a lot more doubt about it than I did. I have my amazing Mom to thank for me being able to accept myself and my best friend MiniPixie for being there when I needed her. Suffice to say, I wrote this to emphasize the importance of accepting your friends and family, even if they’re not sure about what’s going on yet.
-Natalie, written with love and hope to everyone who needs it

It’s been a while since I’ve made a blog post, but today Mojang released a video that really hit me and I wanted to get the words out while I had them. I would strongly recommend watching that video, it’s extremely short but it does a great job of capturing a person’s experience with Minecraft and their disability.

When I was growing up I was ravenous for knowledge, and random pieces of information that I came across would be next obsession. Every week I was on a whole new topic, a completely different field of study. While I still retain a large portion of that hunger, to the extent that “Information Sponge” has come to be my de facto self-description, there has been a rather large change in a significant portion of my world view.

Every dawning day
My hands fill with sticky clay
A substance resistant to shape
One that defies my will to make

Your broken decrepit minds
Ancient in all but time
Burn life away like flies
While drowning the overburdened skies

Just as darkness fuels despair
A man lost is well aware
That he built his binding lair
And his chains are locked by lack of care

As time goes by it becomes harder and harder to trust my senses, to know exactly how and why my body reacts to the world. My interpretation changes by the second and some days it’s impossible to keep up. Each sense working on a scale that changes with every new piece of information I gleam from it, a drastically fast kaleidoscope of broken images and feelings. Brighter lights, clearer sounds, sharper temperatures, and a swaying scope of scale attack me constantly, wearing at my view of the world. Each shift defines a whole new set of actions and reactions to reinvent, a constant game of mix and match, find the value, adjust and prefix.

Of the two brothers one stood out. He was the louder and more enthusiastic one. As opposed to his counterpart who watched from the background, carefully planning each action. The grander brother rushed through ther plan and couldn’t sit still while the universe was defined. Facinated with every machination of their nature he did an uncountable number of expiriments that have altered the world they were building, so manny that even they could not predict their reprecusions.

The first brothers had a certain synergy, largley held up by the tempurate actions of the younger. Always ensuring that his brothers actions would be fruitfull, watching from behind the curtain and pushing the world towards order. He loved his brothers messes and was enthralled by guiding them to their shared goal. Each new crux of disorder was a place their dreams could be born. He shadowed his brother, watching the proceses unfold in his wake, altering the laws they had laid in sequnce to fit their visions.

There was a time in the past, a time where location was nonsense and the all-powerful had not yet been forged. In this abstract place when time never changed a spark hotter than any that will ever exist made itself. That spark had been on a quest to forge a world of beauty and free will, things that had been long lost in it’s home. From that spark grew two beings, entities of creation whose definitions did not yet exist, by today’s words they were the first brothers.